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Home » The Collaborative Leadership Key » 7C. The Empowered Adult
- 7C1. An empowered adult is someone who:
- 7C1i. Operates in the present and is not acting or reacting based on the past.
- 7C1ii. Comes from a place of choice.
- 7C1iii. Is respectful to others.
- 7C1iv. Is open to possibilities.
- 7C1v. Chooses beliefs that serve to build relationships with others rather than tearing them down.
- 7C1vi. Doesn’t blame others when things go wrong.
- 7C1vii. Does not try and control others.
- 7C1viii. Is self-directed.
- 7C1ix. Seeks to understand the other person’s map of reality.
- 7C1ixa. A person’s map of reality consists of a person’s belief system and the resulting way in which she views the world. Beliefs are formed from experiences and can be changed through new experiences or by rethinking the original belief.
- 7C1ixb. An empowered adult accepts that other people have valid maps of reality.
- 7C1ixc. Empowered adults don’t use their maps of reality to judge other people. They act based on what’s happening in the present, not on the filters they have created from past experiences.
- 7C1x. An empowered adult takes full responsibility for her own behavior. She never attributes to others the power to make her do, say, or feel anything she doesn’t want to. When she is in her empowered adult state, she has no need to try and control others, to get others to do what she wants them to do, or to submit to something that they don’t want to do. She is calm and assertive. She follows her own inner direction and guidance. She doesn’t look to others to take care of her. She doesn’t try to take care of other adults.
- 7C1xi. An empowered adult is a powerful person because she knows that a point of power exists between an event and her response to that event.
- 7C1xii. Empowered adults pause to consider what they want and map out the best course of action that will allow them to get what they want, while still building relationships with others. They act out of a clear sense of mission and commitment.
- 7C2. Characteristics of the empowered adult:
- 7C2i. Does not react to triggers – is proactive
- 7C2ii. Controls self, not others
- 7C2iii. Doesn’t take things personally
- 7C2iv. Accepts accountability and responsibility
- 7C2v. Fair, impartial, compassionate, reasonable